Natural Leader and Sensitive Parent

How to connect work ambitions with family life?

This question is asked by many women and men around world and Netherlands. During psychological consultations patients open to me in a safe space about their difficulties with this important topic. Many of them are struggling with two natures inside – an ambitious, strong person, leader & explorer who likes to indicate directions, discover new fields, solve the problem and a warm, emotional, sensitive mother or father.

How to fulfill two strong needs – safe & stabilization vs risk & adventure?

Is it possible or is it  just a contradiction denied? Maybe sometimes in some situations,  specific periods in life it cannot be satisfied at the same time. Some dreams need to be postponed for the time when children grow up. It doesn’t need to mean we bury them forever. If postponing becomes with time a conscious decision than by many thoughts, expressing grief can be freeing and helps to accept individual choice.


Another way is to make a change. To step ahead, go into something new, where there ahead is so many unclarities, obstacles, efforts, rational and irrational fears. How to find courage inside you if the risk seems to be bigger and more is to lose when you are not in your 20’s?
Is it really easier for you to accept unclarity, obstacles, efforts, rational and irrational fears – when you resign from part of you? Every person is individual – special with her/his emotional construction, way of thinking, experience in life, values, set of characteristics and resources. Everyone chooses the individual way to get this answer, which is inside you.

In 2021, nearly 1.3 million (17% of population) working people in the Netherlands struggled with work burnout symptoms which is feeling tired and drained most of the time, self -doubt, helplessness, anxiety, aggression.

As reported in researches done by TNO and Statistics Netherlands concluded in NOS reports,

  • over 40% of employees confirm the need for measures against work stress.
  • 37% indicated that work pressure and stress caused their absenteeism.
  • 11 million days – total number of absent days from work in Netherlands due to stress only in 2021

Occupational health and safety services consider work pressure as one of the biggest risk factors within companies, according to NOS.

Absenteeism costs companies about 3 billion euros per year. Work burndown can become a depression or anxiety disorder with major consequences for their general health and daily functioning. Approximately one out of three people in the Netherlands suffer from depression at some time in their lives.

If you are feeling overwhelmed for a longer time – don’t wait for a crisis, consult with a psycholyst now.

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